Friday, June 06, 2008

i'll Be there for you...

When the rain starts to pour...,
...Like i've been there before...,
...'Coz you're there for me too."


These words made so famous by the decade long run of the sitcom 'F.R.I.E.N.D.S'. Some how manages to -when not just heard, but also thought about- set a sense of contentment. We always as our second nature would dictate, lean on our friends for support for so many things. from the disastrous to the completely joyful , it would help to point out that in the latter's case the support would purely be when one - jumps in delirium,and trips, if there is such a phrase.

Everyday, we feel our day just is more exciting and fun to go through just because they are around us. We really can't imagine a fun day all by ourselves. Even if we are doing stuff we really like, the fun just seems to diminish without them around. During travel, when you are with friends, you would spend time sharing the joy in doing stuff that you do. Be it discussions, laughing at something funny that happened in college that day;or would laugh out loud alone?

No one can really say they don't need friends. or at least they can't say they don't NEED REAL friends. Everyone needs friends. as children, if we grow up in societies where they are fewer kids to play with, we end up making imaginary friends.
I can't provide to you living examples(i can't say that i had imaginary friends, but i did carry out discussions that were quite real with an imaginary person) but i can give you an example we all know of-Calvin and Hobbes. where the 7 yr old kid makes a friend in the stuffed tiger Hobbes.
At least they grow up with the company of someone they make dear to them.
Wonder about those people who outgrew these friends, and then never got incorporated into a group.
Most likely that never happened. like i said everyone needs friends, and these people don't stay out of friends groups....those people who dont fit in... can 'not fit in' TOGETHER!
so there's hope for everyone. :)

We all need friends, those that we can rely on, those that we can share our joys with, those that we can share our sorrows with. Those that make us feel good about who we are, and what we do. these friends may not be in the same person, these friends may be different people, they could be around you, they could be living your life with you, or they could even be in another part of the world.

So if having friends is such a good thing, something that should ordinarily make us happy, then why is it that people are so weary, so often of making friends? So many people are so reluctant to meet new people, and engage in friendly banter with. Everyone thinks it is the only done way to make new friends if you are introduced to a person. Why can't you just chat up with some u meet at the platform? Or you are working out at the Gym , why must there be a need to talk to someone? why cant you just walk up to a person and strike a conversation. why does it sound so absurd? Should it sound absurd?

I might think this person of the opposite sex from a class is a nice person to talk to(or would be a nice person to talk to) from the little i have seen her interact in class. it would still strike me as absurd to go up to her and introduce myself. why you would think i was hitting on her! !

Even in cases of same sex, people just NEVER want to get friendly out of nothing. there must be a reason. i have had issues where people don't on outings just because they don't have people they know with them...if you never give them a chance, you will never make new friends.
you might argue -'why do i need new friends?' and thats not the point at all. Thats the whole wrong outlook.
These people, people who feel that socializing is a talent, or job, or work that needs to be done, they ask for a REASON to talk to people. Well for them...the image is a simple reason...


Just Because There is no such thing as too many friends






9 comments:

NEx'''® said...

why do i feel i was recently paged into ur memory when u were processing this blog...:p


but i hv different opinions ...
i personally dont feel u can make friends if u want to...
it shud be both ways...
they must want u as much as u want them...atleast till the 2 click to be friends..or as u said 'fit in'

until then u r companions or classmates or colleagues...laughin arnd or having a good time with a particular person doesnt make him ur friend...it just cud make him more eligible to be one though...

being able to talk to people in public is dependent on the person's socializing nature.. i dont think if u socialize less u dont have friends...rather itll get u different set of friends...

yes there is always room for more friends...if u r willing to work more to keep up with ALL ur friends...
may be i hold the word 'friend' really high in my social hierarchy...but by shifting someone from 'pal' level to 'friend' level you must realise u have ur responsibilities towards him too..

no. of friends is not how many ppl u consider as friends...but they are how many ppl for whom u r friends too...


{pardon all grammatic errors}

Nikhil said...

i wasn't thinking of anyone when writing this.friends are held very high in my esteem too. neither do i use the word friend loosely....its just to get there, u have to give them a chance.

NEx'''® said...

that is true...
although not many follow it really as the way they say it ...
"main to sabko chance deta hai..."
and end up stayin with a select few and bitchin abt the remaining...

Akshay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Akshay said...

you said it nix....completely agree..... and I love that poster.... (tried to find it in archies....couldnt get it...:(..

karen said...

i so agree , u just need to try to get to know ppl. basically , people who dont are just downiright shy , or maybe they expect u to come up n speak to them coz they dnt think they shd be d one to initiate talks or make an effort

NN said...

Add another; to many socialising is looked at as a tedious chore. And to provide refreshing counterpoint, there are many to whom interaction with people qua people is their main source for the joy of life. Talk, communicate, let people know that you recognise the fact they exist -- in a lift to a kid or its parent, in a restaurant, in a garden, at the beach, in a train compartment, in a hospital corridor etc etc...just reach out and enjoy the presence of another person on Earth. It's fun. But alas there will also be a whole lot of people who will refute this point altogether and insist that unless there is material gain there is no purpose to communicating with another. As Oscar Wilde said, it depends on the point of view.
NN

NN said...

Here's a thought, all my own work, therefore copyright and not to be pinched. :)

Talking, (to anyone, especially a friend) is balm for a troubled mind and Joy for the mind at peace.

The mantra therefore for anyone wishing to "be there" for anyone should be simply, "communicate, communicate, communicate". It helps, both recipient and giver. Try it.

Nikhil said...

If only more people realized the value of open communication and sharing of ideas, no matter how small and seemingly unimportant...